When I Grow Up

"What do you want to be when you grow up?"

I was often asked that as a little girl.
The answer would vary as my whims changed.
"A ballerina"
"A teacher"
"A concert pianist"
"A mommy"

As I grew and changed and became more defined as an individual,
My answer also became more defined:
"A chorus teacher, preferably in a public high school setting."

Now as I look back, and at my life now,
I realize that I still have not really picked out one thing I want to be "When I grow up."

Do I want to be defined by
A career choice
A hobby
Or even one style of appearance or music
As so many around me seem to be?

NO!

I want to be defined by my life.

Here is what I want to be when I grow up:

• A true friend
• Kind and compassionate—even to those who do not seem to deserve it or who I do not understand
• Someone who is quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger
• Willing to be the first one to say, "I was wrong, please forgive me."
• Someone who lives in such a way that those around her know the love, forgiveness and awesome nature of God
• Honest and trust worthy
• Strong but with the tenderness and faith of a child
• Passionate about everything I do
• Someone who sees the good and potential in everybody and every situation
• Someone who believes in miracles
• A life-long learner and explorer who encourages the same in others
• Someone who is always ready to give a smile, hug, word of encouragement or just a willing ear to anyone who may need it
• Someone who always sees the wonder and beauty all around us
• Someone who is never afraid to dust herself off and try again and NEVER GIVE UP!
• Someone who never forgets how fun it is to just be silly
• Someone who always thinks of others first
• A lover of music, art and literature
• Someone who forgives AND forgets
• Someone who believes in fairytales
• Someone who is open to change and trying new things

Sometimes I still think about being:
"A ballerina"
"A teacher"
"A concert pianist"
and yes, even "A mommy"
but these things I have listed above will make me the best I can be
at anything I choose to do in life.
It is a tall order and will take a lifetime of work.
Maybe that means I will never grow up entirely,
But then again,
Who among us ever really does?

-Jennifer Brooke Martin
October 21, 1997